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Forum Home / General Discussion / Ellis Has Gone To France............let's get him!!!!


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Clive Danton
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Clive Danton

Location: London
Registered: 29 Nov 11

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Posted: 5 Sep 12 15:21
I know this for a fact because when I started my whirring, clicking, speaking, writing, computing machine this morning a noticed an electronic mail message from him which read. "Hello Cliveypops. I've gone to France. See you in two weeks"

It gives me no pleasure whatsover to inform you that I immediately copied and pasted his message after making it much better and a lot funnier.

It's what he would have wanted.

Now then Ellis is my mate and a small time soldier in the notoriously intemperate, slathering, folding bunch of failed human flotsam that is The Coal Hole Gang but I still think this would be an excellent opportunity to give the fucker a good beasting behind his back and then bump the thread onto page two hours before he gets back so the poor unsuspecting dolt doesn't suspect a thing and is completely oblivious to the fact that he's been held up to ridicule, mockery and generally subjected to a constant tirade of hurtful, slanderous abuse. Oh Yes!

Right I'll start then!

When I first saw Ellis in a pub in The Strand the first thing that struck me about him was his idiotic hair and the way he tried to disguise the fact that he has a wooden lip by covering his mouth with a Rizla paper.

How I despise him and wish to see his odious blood run copious and free outside his nan's house!!!!

*wheeze*

THE SATIRIST'S SAFE HOUSE.....IT AINT HALF SSHITE MUM
IainB
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IainB

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Posted: 5 Sep 12 16:39
I like Ellis. He gave me make-up tips.

Thanks Ellis!

Debbie

If 42 is the answer, the question is if 24 looks in the mirror, who does she see?
Clive Danton
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Clive Danton

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Posted: 5 Sep 12 19:25
^^^^^^^^^^^^ cyber bully

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Clive Danton
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Clive Danton

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Posted: 9 Sep 12 18:03
Just got off the trumpet with me old mate Armandhammer-Violently-Soothing-Tongue-Cleanser and to be fair I was shocked by some of the dialogue he came out with my friends.

The boy's so browned off with Ellis being a massive poof and an out and out fucktard that he reckons that me and him should dive over to France via cross channel ferry and just steam into him on the spot!

Well I was absolutely outraged to be fair and made no bones about telling the geezer how diabolical and two bob I thought his plan was.

I mean to say if we went by Eurotunnel we could shave at least two hours off our journey and give the bloody great mincing iron hoof an absolute peach of a clumping and still have time for a skinful in Dover on the way home.

No wonder they're starting to call it Broken Britain! Shambles!

THE SATIRIST'S SAFE HOUSE.....IT AINT HALF SSHITE MUM
Fergus McCarthy
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Fergus McCarthy

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Posted: 9 Sep 12 19:12
You funny fucker.

Made me laugh you did.......



You want me as a moderator!
You need me as a moderator!!!
Clive Danton
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Clive Danton

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Posted: 9 Sep 12 21:00

Quote: Fergus McCarthy

You funny fucker.

Made me laugh you did.......


You wait till the poor cunt gets back off his hols in a fortnight Ferg. THEN we'll see some laffin'!

I expect

THE SATIRIST'S SAFE HOUSE.....IT AINT HALF SSHITE MUM
Skoob1999
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Skoob1999

Location: Out on a limb
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Posted: 9 Sep 12 21:07
I don't think he'll be best pleased.

He doesn't find most things funny.

Apart from the late Rod Hull and Emu...but that's another story for another day.

Regards

Skoob.

RIP
Clive Danton
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Clive Danton

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Posted: 9 Sep 12 21:18
Hahahaha now I'm fucking laffin'!

Night Skooby.

Night oil x

THE SATIRIST'S SAFE HOUSE.....IT AINT HALF SSHITE MUM
Skoob1999
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Skoob1999

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Posted: 9 Sep 12 21:33
Nighty night Cliveypops!

See? Fucking lightweight.

Heh heh!

Skoob.

RIP
Clive Danton
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Clive Danton

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Posted: 18 Sep 12 07:31
Now then I've a feeling old Ellis might come mincing back into the forum sometime soon so in the interests of keeping the peace and to avoid hurting the poor bumming bleeder's feelings I'm going to make sure this thread is nicely tucked away on page two or thereabouts.

I mean to say when your as hopelessly entangled in the dark and tawdry world of bumming as he is the last thing you want is for a load of diabolical mickey taking and people laughing and pointing and shouting out "There he is! There's that sodding bummer! Christ what a bummer he truly is and while I'm about it look at his idiot hair!!!!!" aint it?

Right I'll dive off and crack into the graft then folks......

*spins round at sudden noise* Ah Ellis me old mate! Funnily enough I was just talking about you as it happe.....

BLAM!

thud.

THE SATIRIST'S SAFE HOUSE.....IT AINT HALF SSHITE MUM
IainB
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IainB

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Posted: 18 Sep 12 10:09
Clive! Clive!

Are you all right, hun?

I'm not falling for the old 'kiss of life' trick again.

Get up!

Debbie

If 42 is the answer, the question is if 24 looks in the mirror, who does she see?
Sidney Bollocks
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Sidney Bollocks

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Posted: 18 Sep 12 10:20



Welcome back Ellis!

Nice to see you and the missus weren't the target of a seemingly professional hit while you were in France.

Never did trust the French...





 
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