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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 8 Jun 12 19:04
Go on! I'm waiting!







Gen. Kim Jung Young
Brixton

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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 8 Jun 12 20:28
Hello Kim,

A few years ago, a pal of mine moved house from Fulham to Putney. He went into his local pub, and despite trying to start a conversation, no one wanted to know. So, the next evening, he walked up to the door of the pub and banged very hard, knowing that he had the pubs attention, he pulled out his penis, poked it round the door and shouted;

"Recognise anyone?! The patrons fell about laughing, and welcomed him with open arms. Hope this made you laugh.

Pete the Plumb
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Jean Le Fete
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Jean Le Fete

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Posted: 8 Jun 12 22:33

Forumnull






Quote: armfeetandtoe

Go on! I'm waiting!







Gen. Kim Jung Young
Brixton


It's not that I can't help these people it's just, I don't want to. - Tom Hanks - Volunteers
armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 8 Jun 12 22:40 - Edited By: armfeetandtoe, 8 Jun 12 22:41
Jean, that made me laugh, one of my all time greats.
You are now on the council of laugh enlightenment.




Gen. Kim Jong Dong Jnr Justice minister

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Maria Rios
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Maria Rios

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Posted: 8 Jun 12 23:04 - Edited By: Maria Rios, 10 Jun 12 04:35
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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 11:14
Maria, for being so honest and rightious, you are now Major in charge of Chaplin cinema.



Gen Kim Jong Ding Dong Jnr

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Jean Le Fete
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Posted: 9 Jun 12 12:15
Aha! Were in North Korea!Here you go Kim

It's not that I can't help these people it's just, I don't want to. - Tom Hanks - Volunteers
armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 12:26
Class! That song haunts me Jean, the first time I heard it, I could not stop singing it......For such devotion to making my tonsils rattle, you are awarded the; Medal of, "Cream Of Yung Guy"



Gen. Ding Dong Yong

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Jean Le Fete
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Jean Le Fete

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 12:48
With all due respect Kim, I'm outta here!!! Yikes!!!! Where's my genuine Persian carpet, I have to take it with me!!

It's not that I can't help these people it's just, I don't want to. - Tom Hanks - Volunteers
Erskin Quint
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Erskin Quint

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 16:26
I can't make you laugh 'now'.

'Now' - being the present moment at the time you posted - has gone.

'Now' is now 'then'.

Now then, the problem is, I can't make you laugh 'then' either.

Who do you think I am? Dr Who or that bloke in the story by H G Wells who invented a time machine? What was his name? I can never remember, mainly because he didn't have one.



SERIOUS ABOUT DRIVEL
IainB
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IainB

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 17:27
His name was Tim E Traveller.

Glad to be of service [/hat doff]

Iain

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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 18:18
Erskin, thank you, for your explanation. However, I have consulted the sage of Onion, and he/she feels that you are being subversive and trying to topple Gen. Kim Dong Ding jim

To persuade he/she otherwise, you must return with a joke or one liner. failure could mean a spell in the Bobby Crush padded sing along cell.


Gen Dim Wit Dong Pong

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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 18:19

Quote: Jean Le Fete

With all due respect Kim, I'm outta here!!! Yikes!!!! Where's my genuine Persian carpet, I have to take it with me!!


Not so fast man of carpet sellings, you have not applied for your ten joke visa! The guards are on thier way.


Gen. Bong Kim Jing Long

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Jean Le Fete
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Jean Le Fete

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 19:17 - Edited By: Jean Le Fete, 9 Jun 12 19:18
You'll have to catch me first you bastards!SPPPPPPHHHHHT~!!!! I'm on my way to do some military exercises with Japanese masseuses!

It's not that I can't help these people it's just, I don't want to. - Tom Hanks - Volunteers
armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 9 Jun 12 19:54
(Creased with laughter) Let him go! he is far too funny for this place, however, when he returns, we will be waiting!

(That had me laughing Jean, cheers mate)



Gen Wong wing tong

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Jean Le Fete
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Posted: 9 Jun 12 22:48
Good fun Arm and Uncle Kimmy, I'll send you a post card soon you perverts!

It's not that I can't help these people it's just, I don't want to. - Tom Hanks - Volunteers
Erskin Quint
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Posted: 10 Jun 12 11:51
Dear Sir,

I do not know any jokes, but I do have one liner, and here is our old friend Isambard Kingdom Brunel, with our offering:

"Thank you. I should like to proffer my oak-hulled paddle-wheel steamship The Great Western. She was essentially the model for all successful wooden Atlantic paddle-steamers."

Thank you Isambard. I feel sure that all will be happy with this one liner. We could have brought more than one, but we were only asked for one liner.

Felicitations,

EQ and IKB




Quote: armfeetandtoe

Erskin, thank you, for your explanation. However, I have consulted the sage of Onion, and he/she feels that you are being subversive and trying to topple Gen. Kim Dong Ding jim

To persuade he/she otherwise, [a]you must return with a joke or one liner. failure could mean a spell in the Bobby Crush padded sing along cell.


Gen Dim Wit Dong Pong


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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 10 Jun 12 13:55
As ever Erskin, you had me crying with laughter. Your reward will be a post modern bamboo hut in the paddy fields of Kim Jong Ron Hong. In future, please leave your shoes at the palace gates.


Thank you.

Gen. Won Hong Ki Jong Ill Long Pong

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Erskin Quint
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Posted: 10 Jun 12 15:01
Marvellous. I hope I can learn some new post-modern paddy jokes when I am in the hut.

Irish jokes do actually go quite well with rice.

I'm off to book my berth on the first Chinese Junk. It's a pity the Great Western doesn't carve the heaving main any more, I could have gone on that.

Mind you, it never did sail East, it sailed West, so that's buggered anyway.

SERIOUS ABOUT DRIVEL
armfeetandtoe
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Posted: 10 Jun 12 19:29

Quote: Jean Le Fete

Good fun Arm and Uncle Kimmy, I'll send you a post card soon you perverts!


Jean, you must never make public, our secret society, please use an alternative, such as, "You Poppy Pickers" this will please Gen. Kim Kling Hong and you may even get that rickshaw you covet from Erskin.


Gen Fong Fu Fooee!

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Erskin Quint
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Posted: 10 Jun 12 21:56
You calling me a covet?

Rick Shaw.

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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 10 Jun 12 22:06
Sorry Erskin, I did not want to expose your real name, but Jean forced my hand, and my feet. For making such a violation of your sacred title, Gen. Nong Ning Nang will exstend your Bamboo hut and include a sauna where you can grow organic rice without the guilt of knowing that you are robbing your fellow Koreans of soap. For this special event, Gen Ling Dom Wong will pin the medal of, "Haw Mong Wang" on your chest, without pricking you.


Gen. Maw Mang Tong

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Erskin Quint
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Posted: 10 Jun 12 22:46
Throw in a nubile Korean wench and it's a deal.

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Skoob1999
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Skoob1999

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Posted: 10 Jun 12 22:54
Sorry...

Thought you said "Wrench."

I've got a lovely twelve incher with a chrome vanadium finish if anybody's remotely interested.

Will swap for a working alarm clock.

Thanks

Skoob.

RIP
armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 11 Jun 12 20:06
Ah, Mr SKOOB, I have been waiting for you. The bat and the Snow Leopard, are they still being kept in the bamboo rickshaw hut? If so, Gen. Pong Wong Ling Mong would like to have said hut for his wrench. Shes a nice girl.

Gen Hong Yong Long

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