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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

Location: West Sussex
Registered: 11 Jun 10

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Posted: 20 Feb 12 20:51
I ad that Christopher Colombus in the back of me cab last week. Nice bloke, made some nice detective programmes. Only got one eye he has, honest! I think he must have been pissed, started going on about dicovering America!

Dropped him off at Greenwich. No fukin tip though.


Able Hendry

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IainB
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IainB

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Posted: 20 Feb 12 22:19
I ad that Maggie Tatch in the back of my cab last week. It took me bloody ages to get from Kensington to Hounslow just cos the silly cow wouldn't let me do a U-turn.

Iron lady? She smelled rusty to me.

Iain

If 42 is the answer, the question is if 24 looks in the mirror, who does she see?
Colonel Juan
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Colonel Juan

Location: C/O Juanita Juan
Registered: 24 Aug 09

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Posted: 20 Feb 12 22:45


I ad that Katie Price in the back of my cab last week..

Now, I don't arf itch..






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IainB
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IainB

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Posted: 20 Feb 12 22:54
Sorry CJ me ol China, that'll be my folt.

I had Katie in the back of my cab the week before.

Iain

If 42 is the answer, the question is if 24 looks in the mirror, who does she see?
Lynton
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Lynton

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Posted: 20 Feb 12 23:33
I'm goin' by the STD clinic at the royal London Hospital to pick up a bloke called Danton - you can do it if yer like if yers 'ave to go there an' all like. Over...

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Lynton
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Lynton

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Posted: 20 Feb 12 23:36
I 'ad that Mugabe bloke in 'ere the other day off ter 'arrods - only wanted ter pay me in billions of Zimbabwe sheets. Told 'im no I'll take Scottish fivers before I take shit like that. Give me a black look or two the bastard.

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Colonel Juan
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Colonel Juan

Location: C/O Juanita Juan
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Posted: 20 Feb 12 23:36


I ad Pippa Middleton in me cab last night..

she asked me what Katie Price was like..

So I told her about the itch..

d'you know..

the 'tight' bitch never offered a tip..

(inverted commas courtesy of the pervert Danton)






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Lynton
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Lynton

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Posted: 21 Feb 12 00:11
I had that bloody Edwina Curry in 'ere the uvver day. I told 'er Five pahnd fifty luv. She said I've only got three pahnd, 'ow abaht a blow job? I told 'er, I did, if you want luv but it'll cost you anuvver ten quid. You wanna go by the bank?

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Inchcock
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Inchcock

Location: Nottingham, England
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Posted: 21 Feb 12 02:26
I had that Fatima Whitbread in me cab once.

He.. she jumped into the front with me and said: "I'm into taxidermy!, un took her pleasure with me!

Don't have her address do you?

Dermot

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armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 21 Feb 12 16:01
I ad that Florence Nightingale in the back of me cab last night, kept wiping me brow and saying "There there".

Dropped her off at the Charing cross hospital. Fukin candle wax all over me back seat, Wot she want to be carrying a fukin lamp for anyway!?


Give me a farthing she did.




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Erskin Quint
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Erskin Quint

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Posted: 22 Feb 12 00:30
I had the bleedin Visigoths in my cab again last night. Filthy bastards. Dead peasants, ravished maidens, wasted villages all over the bleedin back seat.

Of course it's muggins what has to clean up after the filth.

Scum.

Give me yer Bullingdon Club any day. At least they pay for the damage.

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Erskin Quint
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Erskin Quint

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Posted: 22 Feb 12 00:33
Yeah I had Florence Nightingale in mine once. Funny bint. She had a balaclava on. Kept on tellin me to slow down, cos her owl was upset.

I never saw no owl. She said it was in her pocket.

She didn't have no lamp though.

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Lynton
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Lynton

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Posted: 22 Feb 12 02:04
Gawd that Nightingale woman don't 'arf get abaht she was in my cabs a coupla mumfs back. Said sumfink abaht there being a lot of crime 'ere. I just nodded. Well she stank of carbolic she did, made me heave.

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Inchcock
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Inchcock

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Posted: 23 Feb 12 03:45
I had this 19-year-old, big breasted, short skirted, thick legged, long haired, hirsute, twinkling eyed young lady in me cab yesterday.

When I dropped her off at the clinic, she said she was afraid she had no money with her!

I suggested another way in which she could settle the payment... but she wouldn't budge an Inch on the subject!

Inchcock

Nemo Mortalium Omnibus Horis Sapit
armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

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Posted: 27 Feb 12 10:13
"Ad that Adolf Hiler in the back of me cab last week, kept going on abart the third reich, corse, I ask him wot append to the other two, an he starts rantin an ravin abart dominating the world! Dropped him off at the War Museum in Lambeth, works there as a cleaner.

He wont get anywhere wiv a tash like that, he looks like that Charlie Chaplin".


Leonard Cohen
Fulham Cabs
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