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Les Being
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Les Being

Location: Landfill Tawny, Essex, England
Registered: 21 Jun 11

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Posted: 19 Jul 11 17:31
I have had a eureka moment. As I type very slowly and you people type very fast I've come up with a cunning plan.

One of you will have to come and live with me.

You will be my assistant. It will be your job to type up everything I say, exactly as I say it but in your own words so that it's funny.

I will be willing to pay the princely sum of one shilling a week. I will also throw in one meal a day. When you're not attending to my genius you will be expected to perform normal household chores. On occasion you will also be asked to hold the goat steady.

Eventually I will be rich and famous and you will have the honour of saying that you worked for me. Everybody wins.

This is a flawless plan as far as I see it.

In line with my commitment to equal opportunities only good looking women with large breasts need apply


Life sucks, then you die
P.M. Wortham
This user is offline Literary Dog


Registered: 26 Jun 07

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Posted: 19 Jul 11 19:53
You had me at "Hello"
But then you threw in that damn breast requirement.

PM

Les Being
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Les Being

Location: Landfill Tawny, Essex, England
Registered: 21 Jun 11

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Posted: 19 Jul 11 20:27
I have to say PM, I'm tempted. If nothing better comes along I'll let you know.

What are you like with goats?

Life sucks, then you die
Morse
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Morse

Location: South Carolina, usa
Registered: 20 Jul 08

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Posted: 19 Jul 11 20:35


...Les: check in with Monkey Woods in Thailand...he runs a
Service involving Ghost Riders (sic), Molly Maids, and Lady Boys...
I think that covers all the orifices...

...Btw: Wortham only works for Cheese!

Morse

Whether you're rich or you're poor, it always pays to have money!
Les Being
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Les Being

Location: Landfill Tawny, Essex, England
Registered: 21 Jun 11

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Posted: 19 Jul 11 20:58
Thanks Morse. I do have goats cheese. By the way, you are a little bit dotty, and dash and dot and dash -. -& --- .. - .--- .

Life sucks, then you die
armfeetandtoe
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armfeetandtoe

Location: West Sussex
Registered: 11 Jun 10

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Posted: 20 Jul 11 20:22
Listen, you pervert, its people like you that give places like this a bad name.

I may be a man, but my breasts are big and firm. Well,on a friday night. Any chance of an interview?



Arm xxx

You aint seen me.....right
Les Being
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Les Being

Location: Landfill Tawny, Essex, England
Registered: 21 Jun 11

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Posted: 20 Jul 11 20:32

Quote: armfeetandtoe

Listen, you pervert, its people like you that give places like this a bad name.

I may be a man, but my breasts are big and firm. Well,on a friday night. Any chance of an interview?



Arm xxx



OK, I'll put you on the list. I will need to see the breasts and how good you are with goats.

Life sucks, then you die
Ellie James
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Ellie James

Location: Texas
Registered: 8 Apr 11

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Posted: 21 Jul 11 00:12
I would apply. But your so old you are like my cyber dad.
You would have to pay for my daughter to go to school and have to put up with my American spelling.

Oh. They've encased him in Carbonite. He should be quite well protected. If he survived the freezing process, that is.
Lynton
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Lynton

Location: Paris
Registered: 14 Oct 09

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Posted: 26 Jul 11 16:36
Reference for Mr. Armfeetandtoe

Dear Sir

I have know mr Arm for some time now. He is an upstanding pillar of the community with breasts to die for - which you surely will if you try touching them.

His aptitude with goats is second to none. We are now on the fifteenth film and he has succeeded in not biting one of them. Some are so pleased with his performance that he is followed wherever he goes by caprine admirers.

Yours
Bill Beast

BigBeast Films
Dorking

Watching paint dry

 
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