Tom Cruise - My Spoof Diary

This is the spoof journal of Tom Cruise. It is purely a parody of what we imagine a diary made by Tom Cruise would be like and hope you find the fake diary as funny.

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May 2012

Friday 25 May 1212

My agent has asked me do I want to be in a film about the British phone-hacking scandal. I would play a character called Andy Coluson, a PR officer fo...

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Tuesday 22 May 1212

At a charity auction to raise money for HAITI, my movie buddy Sean Penn told all the women in the room to withhold sex from the men sitting next to th...

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Monday 21 May 1212

Been asked to appear on the Oprah Show again. Her ratings must be dropping, so she's begging me to come on and do the whole 'sofa jumping' thing pr...

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Sunday 20 May 1212

Poor ole' John Travolta. How many claims of sexual harassment against him is it now? Four, five, six? Like the Tiger Woods affairs three years ago...

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Saturday 19 May 1212

Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol out of the way. Maybe I can do a comedy next instead of all these serious roles? The last time I was involved wit...

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February 2012

Wednesday 08 February 1212

July 3, 1999 I have been feeling really down today, I'm not sure why. I don't think Nicole is attracted to me anymore, and to be honest I'm not all t...

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Breaking News...

Feeling Old

I got the results back from my Telomere kit to find out how old I was in Teloyears, and discovered that I've been dead since 2007. Bummer.
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