Sarah Palin - My Fake Diary

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Monday, 1 July 2013

...across the Bering Strait - that little ole creek - and just hop on over to Mother Russia. I'm tired of being on the speaker circuit, being a conservative commentator on Fox News, shooting guns with NRA chums, and all that other hokey-fokey-diplio-doaky. It's time this old girl shook her booty over there in the Ukraine and all those other provinces that I can't remember and certainly can't spell. Yep, right there in the land of Bob Stalin (or was it Fred Stalin? Bubba Stalin? Hell's bells, who cares - he's long past dead, anyhow!)

If you want to see me again, just ask me to appear at your convention. My going rate is $100.000 per half-hour speech. I do have a warm heart for men with cold hands and beards, though. And guns. The bigger and badder the better, boys. Let's just say if you fit the bill, I can be had for a measly $77,000 for a twenty-minute gi...

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