Santa Claus - My Spoof Diary

This is the spoof journal of Santa Claus. It is purely a parody of what we imagine a diary made by Santa Claus would be like and hope you find the fake diary as funny.

Currently showing entries from: 2014 | 2013 | 2012 | 2011 | 2010 | 2009 | 2008 | 2007 | 2006 | 2004

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November 2009


Monday 23 November 099

Dear Diary Had to take the sleigh in for servicing today. That's gonna be 750 quid, at least. Reindeer are still playing up, Blitzen is being a...

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Saturday 14 November 099

Last night there was a knock at my door. When I answered it there were three prostitutes standing there smiling at me. Hoe Hoe Hoe!...

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October 2009


Saturday 31 October 099

Dear diary I made a bid for Setanta Sports today. I'm sick of watching horse racing from Kempton Park. I hope it comes through. I will be able t...

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July 2009


Tuesday 07 July 099

Prancer and Dixon have been at it again. Good thing i had Dixon castrated or Mrs Claus and I would be facing some serious problems right about now - w...

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Monday 06 July 099

Okay.. So it's summer now and I started to get bored! I still gotta wait for like, 5 MONTHS AND A HALF?!? OMG! This is unbelievable... I mean, c'mon!...

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May 2009


Friday 22 May 099

Those twats in the High Court wouldn't rule in my favour of British chimneys being wider for me to fit down them. They told me to 'lose weight' instea...

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Wednesday 20 May 099

I checked my list. Again. Hope them little b*st@$!s are grateful.

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Monday 11 May 099

It's May now, so no one cares about Santa Claus. This is the time of year when the clothes start coming off and the bikinis and halter tops start pop...

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Breaking News...

Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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