I always wanted to go to Cuba. But I never figured they would arrest me as a terrorist and send me here. The F15's around my sled, that was tacky.
Sure, I left a lot of unattended packages a lot of places; some of them could have been airports.
But, hey, I'm a good guy. I hope they don't put too much aspartame in the water when they water-board me.
And that was really nasty what they did to my animals. Stacking them all up on top of each other! They must have been so embarrassed.