Ray Mears - My Fake Diary


Monday, 14 April 2008

"WASH THOSE HANDS!" Who could that be?

Although it sounded familiar, it was not female so I was so sure it wasn't Carina. I had a good selecton to choose from and the likely suspects were Nurse Gladys Emmanuel from 'Open all hours'; Fergus McCarthy because cleanliness is next to Godliness; J'man could be telling me to erase the smell of garlic from my hands or it coud have been Fish who died aged 117 a week or so ago.

Ever smelt a dead fish?

I might have been dreaming because Gordon Bennet appeared from nowhere - and in the nude too!

Someone tell me I'm dreaming!

I know Carina tells me to "Dream on Baby!" but then again so does Gordon Bennet!

HELP! I'm going mad....

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