Ray Mears - My Fake Diary

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Thursday, 14 February 2008

The aeroplane 'pancaked' on the ice as many penguins slammed into the wings and fuselage. There was lots of blood, fur and feathers as 'pilot-Pat's' nose went through the cockpit window and his black & white cat, Mess, went through all of his 9 lives in one go!

Unfortunately my mate Lord Lucan had bought it too!

Only me and the bloody pilot were left alive and we had to make plans for our survival. Being an expert in survival, I told Pat that we should remain in the shelter of the aircraft, eat and most of all stay warm!

We laid Lord Lucan 'in state' and put the cat beside him; we then piled several penguins next to them.

It's bitingly cold and snowing heavily...

will write more tomorrow.





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