Ray Mears - My Fake Diary


Sunday, 11 January 2009

Me n me mate Gordon were over in the Papua New Guinea Highlands for a few days.

There to learn a coupla tricks obviously and pass on a few Western civilised sneaky moves also.

Well, sun-downers: campfire acceptance, part of the tribe stuff, smoke a bong-full of the local grass, a tipple or three of the boy's magic brew, and then they want to initiate us into their version of the Freemason's Lodge.

Great. Maybe?

The initiation ritual was to wrestle into submission then ceremoniously butt-shag a Bougainville Tantrum Devil.

Bit like the Tasmanian version but with more teeth and a shittier attitude.

I pulled a quitter on this, claiming religious vows of monogamy, but Gordon's had his hormones up n running and gave it one.

Reckoned it's the best shag he'd had since Grammar School.

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