Dear Diary -
Well it looks like I've only got two months left of bachelorhood before I marry Kate (Middleton) on April 29.
I am such a lucky guy. She is such a lovely girl even if she does look a little bit like Julia Roberts, who I have never cared for because of her gigantic trout snout of a mouth.
Earlier today, I received a text message from Charlie Sheen and he informed me that he will definitely be coming over from America to attend my bachelor party on April 28.
That Charlie is one crazy 'hombre,' he let me know that he will also be bringing over five of the prettiest and sexiest call girls in all of California.
I told my brother Harry and he started hollering and yelling "Charlie Sheen! Charlie Sheen! Charlie Sheen! I do not recall ever seeing Harry happier.