Dear diary, I'm getting a bit fed up with the Katwill show. Every time I turn on the bleedin' TV or switch on the lap top, there they are, looking prim as a pair of peacocks. Blimey, anybody would think they were like Royalty. Oh yeah, that's right, they are! You people in the press, yes you, have got to stop all this BS and start writing some REAL stories like Prince Harry snogs Lindsay Lohan or Prince Harry shows IT off. Drop the whole love birds saga.

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