Napoleon - My Spoof Diary

This is the spoof journal of Napoleon. It is purely a parody of what we imagine a diary made by Napoleon would be like and hope you find the fake diary as funny.

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October 2014


Friday 24 October 1414

NOV 1804 The German snows begin to fall outside and my porridge is frozen... I have not had my oats in days... The Czar of Russia wishes to mee...

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Thursday 23 October 1414

Novembre 1804 Apparently Admiral Lord Nelson is now looking for access to my Jospehine's Tombola Soirees....though how he will enjoy it, with his...

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Thursday 23 October 1414

Novembre 1804 Bonsoir mon journal and all you Anglais, Russes et Autrichiens, I know you spy on me, by infiltrating my Diary, at least , I hope s...

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Wednesday 22 October 1414

Novembre 1804 Cher Journal, To recap, ma Belle Josephine has just returned from her Saturday Job , rubbing down the horses chez les Hussars, in...

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Wednesday 22 October 1414

Novembre 1804 Ma Belle Josephine has returned from rubbing down the horses, 'chez Les Hussars'.... I say nothing, as she enters my Campaign Tent ,...

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Wednesday 22 October 1414

Novembre 1804 I have been advised that my planned conquering of Russia will most likely lead to the deaths of my men , due to the unforgiving Siber...

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Wednesday 22 October 1414

2 Novembre 1804 Further to my tiresome exchange with my court painter, I have grown a little stubble : 'à'la six heures' , to quote those Anglais...

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Wednesday 22 October 1414

NOVEMBRE 1 1804 Bonsoir I have been sitting for my Battle Portrait at the brush of Jacques - Louis...this has entailed taking orders in a way...

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Harvey Weinstein ejaculated from Motion Picture Academy

In an emergency meeting of the Motion Pictue Academy, reviewing the sexual antics of Weinstein until, in a crescendo of passion, they ejaculated him all the way to New Jersey, land of the creeps.
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