Dear Diary,
My sports minister told me that the evil Americans have this game called "football" and that their championship game is coming up soon.
I think that the evil Americans stole their game from us. For thousands of years, our nation has played "lamb ball." We take the head of a lamb, put it in the middle of a field, and whoever eats the entire lamb head first wins.
I think we have a case.
The End.
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