Kim Kardashian is in London to promote her fragrance, and stealing vital newspaper coverage from British stars.
I'm at least halfway down the Daily Mail sidebar of shame. I used to be a top ten fixture.
Perhaps we can do a reality show together, Kimmy and Kerry go Kerrr-razy in Kornwall. Or Kingston. I've never been to Kingston.
I'm not sure what we'd do there that would be crazy, give me a bottle of vodka and my medication which I'm not suppose to mix, and I'm sure I'd think of something.