I was feeling really rough today, and spent the whole day in bed. I think I caught something at the charity event yesterday.
I still feel quite ill now but it was really bad earlier, not that I let that stop me from getting up to some old tricks!
I've been plotting this jape since last November, after seeing a big traffic jam on the news caused by an overturned lorry. I had it all written down on my laptop, I even made a computer simulation of the whole thing with the help of my good pal Noel Edmonds. He's really good with computers, he's good with everything, especially women. He's amazing.
Anyway, I'd picked out strategic places in the town where I would ask to be picked up by taxis, with the hope of causing total gridlock in the local streets. So I rang three local taxi firms, asking for the taxis to pick up from the twelve points, ...