Bastards!
The newspaper-bastards are calling my half-wit, apprentice king son, 'a miserable swine'.
--- Just because he refused to appear on 'Doctor bloody Who'.
There's only one miserable swine in the Windsor family and thats me!
Bloody slitty eyed, lentil eating bastards!
Bastards one and all!
Shan't be inviting the Doctor Who bastards to my, state funeral!

Follow us on Twitter