I just saw in the National Shitpot on the newstands that I'm drinking heavy again. I really hate that.
Also, the Clintons have broken up over Bill constantly wanting her to eat sausages before they go to bed and wearing a big hair wig.
There's a Bigfoot that wants to marry Sarah Palin.
Hey they got him! Barack Obama seen dancing shirtless at topless bar in Hawaii.
How do they expect people to b-buy and b-believe thish crap? HIC! Scuse.