Deer dairy, arm upset agen now coz a wont be goin' to de Werld Cup no more. Well a can go but a cant play. A was planning t' scor lodes of goles. Tori's ded upset wiv me and sumone sed she was 56 wen they rote about us in The Spoof. A keep teling 'er is wosnt me wot sed it.
An' sumwon sed I sliped on a banana peel, which wosn't troo. Everywon no's it was dog poo. An' nowon wud cleen me boots so a 'ad to do it meself in the amblance on de way to de hospikal.
Tork later eh?