Brett Favre - My Fake Diary

...detached from my hat, a sporty looking convertible came roaring up the track, screeched to a halt and a very foxy lady eyed me up and down. I raised my hat and adopted a sophisticated air. "Well howdy, pretty missy," I purred, "we don't normally get folks as lurvely as you this far off the main road. Are you looking for any footballing superstar in particular?"  I flashed my.........3-time MVP medallion. She said, "Do you know which is Fred Smoot's ranch?" I waved back the way she'd come. "It's over there," I barked, grumpily, "but it's not really a ranch......this is a ranch." I indicated behind me but she was already reversing. "His should be correctly called a farmstead," I yelled after the fast retreating vehicle. "And ask him how's his goat?"