Brett Favre - My Fake Diary

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Thursday, 19 January 2012

...blowfish, one luminescent sea anemone) and then floated down towards the delta on my wooden raft. Time stood still, the river grew wider and wider, I drifted along thinking about glories gone and the great, gaping void of the future and eventually I was rescued by the coast guard again. As the helicopter winched me down into the yard Sgt. Dearborn shouted to Deanna, "Has he got a death wish?" I've got all five, I thought, suddenly enthused. Brittany bought them for me in a box set. I hurried to the video nook for some good ol' gung-ho Bronson retribution.

At bedtime, as Deanna tucked me in, she suddenly said, "Are you happy, Brett?" Why wouldn't I be, I replied. I have a wonderful wife, wonderful kids, an enormous farm, thirty-seven tractors, all the Wrangler jeans I can wear (ker-ching!), the adoration and respect of the nation. I have it all. When she ...

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