Brett Favre - My Fake Diary

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Sunday, 15 January 2012

...is. It became quite a jostling match until Bus arrived and shot them all. A press conference was hastily arranged and he said I had no intention of un-retiring unless it was for a genuine Superbowl contender and $20 million. A helicopter from the Jets arrived and when we laughed till our sides ached Rex Ryan threw high-heeled shoes at us for twenty minutes.

I went into the barn in a farm-chic check shirt and Wrangler jeans (ker-ching!), arranged some bales of hay into a pyramid and then I climbed to the summit / metaphorically ascended into the pantheon of the footballing gods. Then I fell off and ricked my back.

After dinner I watched There's Something About Mary again and found tears welling in my eyes. I was wonderful in that movie and what the Oscar voters never knew was that I was carrying several injuries that would have ruled out all lesser scene-stealing ...

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