Dear Diary,
Well, I've been President for a year now and still haven't done a single thing. Except flown round and round the world in circles for no reason at all, except to get on American TV news. I got a surprise in London, Diary, when I found out that the British not only have no interest in the USA, they see the place as a complete joke. The mightiest country in the world a joke! Them Limeys are crazy, why, Americans have - er, Americans ... have ...
Anyway, looks like what the British call 'cannon fodder' - American soldiers - are going to stay in Iraq. Michelle told me that Iraq is a British colony, but I laughed at that! I mean, as if soldiers of the mightiest country in the world that won independence from Britain in 1776 would still be sending their soldiers to die in ... a British colony ... for oil ... and will never win ... that war ....
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