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Spoof news events on this day in history
Showing page 4 (of 9 pages)
(2003) Baby Busts Cap in His Momma's Ass
Gang culture invaded the crèche today as a two year old child shot his mum in retribution for humiliatingly changing his Huggies pull-ups in front of other kids.
(2007) Kieren Fallon race-fixing trial begins
Old Bailey, London - (Rotters): Seven women and five men got to post on Monday at the Old Bailey as the sworn-in jury members hearing the evidence that says former champion jockey Kiere Fallon is a race-fixing felon.
(2001) Old Firm to join Rollerball League
As confusion hangs over their entry into the English Premiership, Celtic and Rangers have turned elsewhere in their desperate attempt to finish 7th and 8th in the league by moving to America to join one of the successful Rollerball leagues.
(2007) Bush Suggests Manure Homes for Americans
Washington (IP) - George Bush announced today a new program designed to put a roof over the heads of folks who lose their homes to the rising wave of foreclosures sweeping the country. He told Meet the Press today that homes made of horse and cow ma...
(2009) Sea Monster Visions Linked to Distilleries
Drumnadrochit - Worldwide reports of sea monsters, Bigfoot and other mysterious creatures have been linked with the location of breweries or distilleries nearby causing some to think that a relationship may exist. Investigative reporter Fergus McFadd...
(2009) Alabama judge accused of sex with invertebrates
Mobile, Alabama - (Cell Phone Scam): Judge Herman Thomas has been indicted on multiple c[o]unts of shagging a spineless fifth column of perpetrators.
A former Democratic Party hot pick to be the first black feral judge in south Alabama, Thomas is...
(2001) Star Trek - Guilty
Star Trek fans reacted with horror today as the US Federal Court returned a guilty verdict against the show's producers over cruelty to crewmembers in red sweaters.
(2003) Police Academy Star Runs for Presidency
That Guy Who Made Sound Effects, star of seven ‘Police Academy' films is 15% ahead in the polls in the Presidential election campaign.
(2001) Critic Sez The Media is 'Pap and Useless'
Shocking news for all us news fans. Some buffed-up critic called Funky Spyglass has described our television as "pap" and the Internet as "useless".
(2011) Chris Christie Enters the Race for Ruler of Occupied Wall Street
Trenton, New Jersey - Gov. Chris Christie, who turned down the chance to run for president of the United States earlier this week, has announced his candidacy for Ruler of Occupied Wall Street.
"Being president is not for me. You have to be certif...
(2007) "Chase me", shouted Celtic "Yob"
AC Milan keeper Dida today stated that the 'assault' that could still cost Celtic valuable Champions League points was little more than a 'colpo delicato della mia guancicaor' or as we would say ' a gentle stroke of my cheek'.
(2010) CSI, Stargate, Fringe - Ratings Punch-Up On Cards
TV insiders are gearing up for a new ratings war as Sky1 goes up against Channel 5 on Tuesday nights.
C5's popular CSI:Miami and CSI:New York will tonight find themselves in direct competition with two sci-fi blockbusters - the second series of S...
(2004) CBS Publishes Yet Another Bogus Document
NEW YORK -- For CBS News president Andrew Heyward, the past few hours have been all too familiar. No sooner had he walked off the elevator after his lunch, he was bombarded by a group of junior executives informing him of the organization publishing...
(2010) Baroness Warsi, you were elected by, oh that's right you were not
Baroness, "not wishy washy but bossy", alleges that 3 Labour MP's were elected because of electoral fraud.
The Baroness, has not however, substantiated the allegations with real evidence. Strangely, she cancelled an appearance on Question Time, be...
(2001) Tony the Tiger Mauls Pop of Snap Crackle Fame
Pop, the cheeky little fella from the Rice Krispies adverts, has been mauled to death by Tony the Tiger following years of enforced vegetarianism.
(2008) Date for "Rich Aid" concert announced as Britain's richest suffer credit crunch
Sir Bob Geldolf has come to the rescue of Britain's wealthiest men as the credit crunch begins to affect their billions of pounds.
"Rich Aid" is being held in the Dog and Duck pub in Islington and will be beamed live around the world next week to...
(2009) Michael Jackson Zombie Plot Foiled?
Recently a team of scientists came to the conclusion that while the earth might survive a vampire attack, it could not survive a zombie attack.
Not understanding the reasoning behind such a study, most have concluded that these men and women have...
(2001) British Dance Unhealthy
A survey published this week has found the state of British dance music to be very unhealthy.
(2007) BMWs still being built by Nazis claims competitor
Moscow, Russia - (Rioters): Russia's Zavod Imeni Likhacheva - or ZIL - automobile company has slammed claims that Nazis are no longer involved in the manufacture of BMWs as risible.
(2004) Wisconsin Woman's obituary endorses Kerry
MADISON, Wis. - A Wisconsin newspaper's obituary for Jan Buffet includes a brief remembrance of her life, including how she was upset and offended by President Bush's policies. The obituary then asks people in the swing state to honor her wishes...
(2007) Football Game Becomes Riot Scene
Miami, Florida (IP) - A football game between the New York Jets and the Miami Dolphins turned into an all out riot Sunday which ended only when the National Guard was called in by Governor Crist.
(2008) Treasury now wants to bail out foreign banks!
There has been a 21st century epiphanenomenal revelation by President Bush and Congress that the pocket of the American taxpayer is bottomless - almost even, some are whispering, as limitless in available cash as Oprah - even after a wild Saturday ni...
Showing page 4 (of 9 pages)
Iron Manifold
SAN DIEGO, CA--Five years after hearing it for the first time, Danny Orsi still has no idea that theBlack Sabbath song "Iron Man" wasn't written for the film series.
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