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Spoof news events on this day in history
Showing page 3 (of 8 pages)
(2007) Michael Owen Called Up By England Despite Horrific List Of Injuries
Michael Owen has been included in the England squad for the vital Euro 2008 qualifying games against Estonia and Russia, despite the fact that he is injured.
(2007) Diana Was Pregnant - Inquest
The inquest trying desperately to decide whether or not Princess Diana was pregnant when she died, has heard that she had told close friends that, indeed she was, and that the drunken French chauffeur Henri P...
(2009) Amy Winehouse Reveals Roman Polanski's Secret
Roman Polanski, famous French-Polish film director of such noted movies as "Rosemary's Baby" has had a secret from most people for many years and that secret has been blabbed by none other than singer Amy Winehouse.
In an exclusive interview by th...
(2010) Chelsea Handler Burps, Fills Room With 50-Scent.
Giving credence to the rumour that 50-Cent has f--ked every single woman in the world under 200 lbs and/or 45 years old, he's started dating 50-something Grammy host-epicfail Chelsea Handler.
And Chelsea put the rumours to rest at the craft servi...
(2009) Largest Dinosaur Discovered in Cumbria
The bones from the largest dinosaur ever discovered have turned up in a back garden in Cumbria, England.
Ray Dioaktif was planting his strawberry crop ready for next year when his spade hit what at first he thought was a rock, Excavating around th...
(2009) First brain extension operation a complete success
The first brain extension operation has been hailed a complete success by Dr David Brown who works part-time as a GP in Somerset. He was asked to carry out the procedure by two accountants who'd come to look over his books.
He said he hadn't pla...
(2009) Dowler cops dredge Princess Diana Fountain
London - (Clunkers): A tip-off has sent police frogmen to the Diana, Princess of Wales Mammorial Fountain and its taxpayer-funded duck house.
They are looking for the car which may have been part of Milly Dowler's 2002 abduction.
The Red Daewoo...
(2007) 'Dead Prince Harry' is this year's Turner Prize nomination
London Design Museum - (Ass Mess): The top nomination for this year's Turner Prize is an exhibit called 'Dead Prince Harry' featuring the Puppet Monarchy's ginger nut, resplendent in full military dress uniform, and dead as a Dodo.
(2005) Congress Introduces Federal Office Space Rental Program
CAPITOL HILL-Location, location, location are the three most important words in real estate. And members of Congress have come up with an innovative way to use those three words to increase their income without actually giving themselves an of...
(2004) Mount Saint Helens lets it out
Friday October 1, 2004 Mount Saint Helens had a so called "eruption." But was it really? According to Dr. Vulcansniger, a Vulcan Practologist, it is not so. "When they called me in to give my hypothesis, I decided to take a closer...
(2010) Clowns Picket Alton Towers Claiming Not To Be Evil
There was widespread panic at Alton Towers yesterday as thousands of clowns armed with outsized shoes and plastic buttonholes that squirt water out chained themselves to railings at the Staffordshire theme park.
The clowns are upset about a new Ha...
(2009) Tree loving tree hugger is eaten by trees
The remains of missing UK hippy tree hugger Lesley Mandleson has been found today in the Amazon rainforest where he was attempting fend to off illegal logging by tying himself to trees.
Rescue worker Fidel Ramerez said, "Ok, this guy (26, beard) w...
(2009) Obama Taps Biden and Hilary to "Straighten out Afghan Mess!"
Washington,DC/ Pentagon Update on Leaking Military News - President Obama, no longer thought of as having a decisive intellectual mind, has yet again prolonged making a military decision on Pentagon experts calling for increased US troops on the gro...
(2007) Shimon Perez: "Madonna is my daughter"
Tel Aviv - (Reuterus): Israeli President Shimon Perez has said that an exact DNA match between himself and 'ambassador for Judaism' Madonna points to just one thing:...
(2012) Tom Brady 'Admires' Peyton Manning
Tom Brady took an interesting approach to the 'old man' of the game, Peyton Manning.
Like some fawning rookie just starting to play in the NFL, Tom took the high road to deliver a low blow. When asked what he thought about Peyton Manning, Brady r...
(2008) Palin Invites McCain to Her Bed...Tanning, that is!
Ambitious Alaskan Bronze Beauty runner up Sarah Palin had a used tanning bed installed in the Alaskan Governor's trailer just days after the inauguration. A variety of rationales were provided at the time, like "Alaska is friggin' frigid" to my Hotti...
(2009) Jessica Simpson does a Pocahontas-saves Chupacabra from Sarah Palin-Couple wed by Janet Reno
PHOENIX, AZ (ABSNN) with Abel Rodriguez on site - Jessica Simpson, possessor of the World's Most Dangerous Vagina, and a member of Sarah Palin's Chupacabra Hunting Expedition, became a Pocahontas of sorts, when she disarmed Palin, and saved the life...
(2006) Barney Gets Sucked into Jet Engine
Air Force One's pilot Reed Mathews was suspended today after he pushed the wrong button causing screaming jet engines to roar to life the very moment President Bush and Barney were boarding the plane. Witnesses say that Barney Bush whirled INTO...
(2011) Michele Bachmann: "Romney is Gay"
GOP Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann announced today that she has "indisputable proof" that co-candidate Mitch Romney is gay.
"Just look at that hair," she said, "and those teeth. Nobody looks that good unless they're either a movie star o...
(2010) Purple potatoes, husband unhappy with multi cultural food.
The sale of purple potatoes is causing quite a stir the length and breadth of Christendom today as healthful housewives are purchasing the puce produce by the pan-load.
The reason for the sudden interest in the beta version of this newly tried and...
(2007) Astronomer Spots Tiny Galaxy
Mount Palomar, California (IP) - Astronomer Dr. Povenmire Finootch found a tiny galaxy half way across the universe (which is kind of odd since the universe is infinite in size and so where is the half way point of forever ?).
(2010) John Lennon Tribute Guitar Fails To Impress Axemen
Legendary guitar manufacturer Gibson has been slammed by guitarists for its plans to release a John Lennon "signature" model.
Asked by Lennon's widow, Yoko Ono, to mark his 70th birthday, Gibson plan to release a limited number of specially-built...
Showing page 3 (of 8 pages)
Iron Manifold
SAN DIEGO, CA--Five years after hearing it for the first time, Danny Orsi still has no idea that theBlack Sabbath song "Iron Man" wasn't written for the film series.
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