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Spoof news events on this day in history
Showing page 5 (of 9 pages)
(2008) Ocain and McBama Show off their Planes!
Senator Obama has been showing off his new campaign plane "Air Change One" to all his friends. The state-of-the-art jet airliner has the latest in telepathy navigation: Senator Obama wears a special Blue Tooth, and at a moment's notice, as the whim...
(2007) Sen. Larry Craig to remain in office for his term; wastes no time introducing bill retroactively legalizing bathroom sex at Int'l airports
Washington, D.C. - After promising to resign once it was disclosed he was arrested and pleaded guilty for soliciting sex in a public restroom from an undercover policemen at an international airport, Sen. Larry Craig (Rep.) announced today he would s...
(2010) Bob Dylan Music Introduced To Youth By Indie Artists Gets All Screwed Up!
According to a news release, a new project aimed to introduce Bob Dylan's music to young people by having buzz-worthy indie artists cover one of his best-known albums in a digital-only format has been quickly withdrawn and destroyed.
Apparently a...
(2007) O'Brien Arc desperation tactics as Zambezi Sun shines
Ballydoyle - (Disaster Mess): Trainer Aidan O'Brien is in desperation overload to win Sunday's Prix de l'Arc de Triomphe and is saddling four contenders for the Longhamps showdown amid a wall of money coming in to back local hero Zambezi...
(2001) Boy Stalked By Old Actor
Police are to launch an investigation after a boy of 12 told them an elderly actor had been stalking him at a rugby match. The incident took place at Esher rugby ground in Surrey last month.
(2007) Hometrack survey says renting a house is cheaper than buying it
Fat-cat boffins from York University have concluded after a year's study and free Government grants that renting a house is cheaper than buying it.
(2007) Africa Tired of Creating Hurricanes
Saheel, Africa (IP) - The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration reports that next year there may be a lack of hurricanes due to social pressures in Africa.
(2010) U.S. Drones Target Governors and Celebrities Whose 15 Minutes are Over
The Department of Defense flatly denied any plans yesterday, to use U.S. armed drones in the targeting of washed up politicians and celebrities who continue to demand attention and spin in news cycle, when their day in the sun is clearly over.
Emp...
(2001) Hamiltons Face Fresh Sexual Deviance Charge
United Nations President Kofi Annan issued a plea for calm today amid claims that disgraced former Tory MP Neil Hamilton and his wife Christine sexually assaulted the island of Tonganoma during an official government visit in 1993.
(2001) NHS - Government Resolute On Overseas Treatment
Prime Minister Tony Blair today defended his government's apparent U-turn on allowing NHS patients to be treated abroad. "We are a pan European community," said Mr Blair. "Why shouldn't patients be treated in Germany or Franc...
(2011) Did two computer nerds invent Britney Spears in a science experiment?
Britney Spears, Lady Gaga, LeAnn Rimes and many other leading pop artists are all the creation of two computer support technicians from Pittsburg, it was claimed today.
In an exclusive interview in Melody Maker, Dwayne Poindexter and Dwight P. La...
(2009) Roman Polanski Rape Comedy Set For Xmas Release
Good news for devotees of noted locked-up film director Roman Polanski as his latest movie is set for a December release. It's a comedy based around a rape, and is somewhat autobiographical in concept.
Polanski remains in protective police custody...
(2009) Letterman Weighs in on Charges of Sexual Impropriety
INDIANAPOLIS, INDIANA - David Letterman chose the Arby's on SW 41st Avenue in the city of his birth to reflect to a hastily-gathered, exclusive group of reporters about the charges of sexual impropriety that have recently plagued him.
Smells of th...
(2007) Middle Classes in Turmoil as House Prices Stabilise
The land registry reported that annual house price growth was only 9.6% for the year to date, down from 9.9%. This would mean that only £19,200 would be added to the value of an average £200,000 home by December.
(2007) Congress Debates Internet Pirating
District of Columbia (Shivermetimbers, arrgh, Post) - The US House of Representatives took up the important business of what not to do about internet pirating this week.
(2011) Intelligent Design start a kids club
The Discovery Institute, the For Prophets organisation set up to preach and teach about intelligent design, has decided the time is right for a junior wing to the movement after repeated failures to convince anybody with an IQ above minus fifty that...
(2010) Nobel Winners Embarrassed: Can't Find Example Of Winning Material
Physics Nobel Prize Winners Andrei Geim and Konstantin Novoselov have lost the very thing that won them the accolade.
Geim and Konstantin are the inventors of graphene - a flat sheet of carbon just one atom thick. It is extremely strong and is a g...
(2001) Foot And Mouth Crisis Thickens
Cumbria farmer Arthur Sidebottom today shocked the agricultural community by suggesting radical reforms as the county's farmers prepare to restock their farms following the foot-and-mouth crisis.
(2009) John Edwards Exclusive Blockbuster Of A Story!
In it's 39th bombshell about John Edwards, the National Inquirer now has it's 54th exclusive, this time it's the mother-in-law of John Edwards former campaign aide's cousin's friend Luigi as he reveals that the family knew all along that her son-in-l...
(2006) Bonesmen demand burials parity with wiccan, satanist, creationist veterans
Washington DC - (Associated Mess): Aggrieved members of the Ancient American Order of the Skull 'N' Bones are seeking a Supreme Court judicial ruling following an ongoing appeal by assorted wiccan veterans for the right to display their trad...
(2001) Coffee Remains Unmade As Intern Numbers Fall
The National intern shortage worsened last night as new appointments fell for the third time in as many months.
(2009) Detroit Lions' Only Fan Calls It Quits After Sunday's Crushing Defeat
DETROIT, MICHIGAN - When the Detroit Lions had their first win in nearly two years - a 19-14 defeat of the Washington Redskins on September 27 - Harry Havisham was there to rejoice in the moment. In fact, he was the only fan in Ford Field that day,...
Showing page 5 (of 9 pages)
Nation Mourns Death of Serial Killer
"There's nothing on television, rotten movies, sex has gotten boring, tired of seeing youth with rings through their digits!", admits several at Jim's Bar & Girl.
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