Spoof news events on this day in history
(2007) Hooters Waitress, Kyla Ebbert, loses carry-on luggage during Southwest flight to Playboy.com interview; in-flight nudity, body shots and debauchery
San Diego, California - In an attempt to make amends to Hooters waitress, Kyla Ebbert, for forcing her off their flight for wearing allegedly scantily clad clothing, Southwest Airlines offered to fly Ebbert to her Playboy.com interview free of charge...Read full story
(2003) Hulk Porn Greeted With Bad Press
NEW YORK CITY-Comic book legend Stan Lee announced that the release of Marvel's new adult movie ‘Hulk In The Pants' will be delayed due to the string of bad press the unreleased movie has already received from critics.Read full story
(2012) Doper's request for 'one more joint' lands him in the joint
CINCINNATI, Ohio (ABSNN) - A convicted pot smoker's request to smoke "one more joint before quitting," landed him in the joint after an Ohio judge "was astonished by his request." Damaine Mitchell, 19, was sentenced to prison by Hamilton County...Read full story
(2008) 16yr old Condy Rice Nude Pics On Internet
The US State Department has gone into damage control after nude shots of outgoing Secretary Of State Condoleeza Rice appeared on some Internet sites over the weekend. The pictures were taken some 16 years ago when Ms Rice, then 38, was studying Po...Read full story
(2005) Michael Jackson Uses The Ladies Room
Michael Jackson entered the ladies room of a Middle Eastern shopping mall, put on some make-up at the mirror, and left. Afterwards, he said that he had not understood the symbol on the door and was confused by it. Jackson explained that his visit t...Read full story
(2006) Snow White charged in "Dumpty" murder
Never, Never Land - Snow White, legendary storybook character, was indicted today on first-degree murder charges. The victim named in the case was another popular story character, Humpty Dumpty. Detectives opened the cold case, after advances in fo...Read full story
(2005) Jennifer Aniston is GQ's Man of the Year
Jennifer Aniston has been chosen as "Man of the Year" by GQ (Gentleman's Quarterly) Magazine. Her selection for this honor has begun speculation that:...Read full story
(2006) Dickens's Shocking Sex Stories
A fresh insight into the shadowy world of Charles Dickens was revealed today when a cache of documents was discovered hidden inside an old writing desk that had come up for auction at Sotheby's.Read full story
(2005) Schwarzenegger Wins Oscar for 'Best Actor' for Role as 'The Governor'
At the gala, star-studded Academy Awards ceremony, Arnold Schwarzenegger received the coveted Oscar for the category of "Best Actor", for his acting role as Governor of California. When Schwarzenegger first began his term as governor, he knew less...Read full story
(2012) The twinkeling out of Hostess Twinkies and Wonder Bread
NEW YORK CITY (ABSNN) - Hostess Brands, the bakers of Wonder Bread, Ho Hos and Twinkies, announced today it will shut down its remaining two plants due to a strike that crippled its operations. Although the company will cease operations, Twinkies ha...Read full story
(2010) Prince William to marry Kate Middleton, is she a Virgin?
Prince William has announced his plans to marry his long-term girlfriend, Kate Middleton, so what? Well at least the world has some happy news to celebrate and Royal followers will be jumping over the moon. But there is one slight worry about K...Read full story
(2006) Diana Fountain 'modelled on Dead Sea Scrolls latrine'
London - (Associated Mess): The mysteries of the crystal healing waters of the Diana, Princess of Wales Memorial Fountain were revealed today at a Dead Sea Scrolls conference convened by the Royal Geographical Society, which has described how the Hyp...Read full story
(2007) Vanessa Hudgens flying to London for quicky virginity-repair op
Harley Street, London - (Hymen Mess): High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens is rumored to be on her way to the UK for a quickie hymen-fixing operation on the National Health Service.Read full story
(2008) Stephen Fry in America
No Man's Land, Utah - BBC is now airing their latest travel series featuring resident idiot savant Stephen Fry criss-crossing America in a London black taxi. True to BBC form, the series is a remake of their 1882 filming of Oscar Wilde's travels in A...Read full story
(2005) Prince Charles- "My Twin Passions, Homeopathy and Infidelity."
Prince Charles has spoken of his desire to spread the word on the benefits of homeopathy and his unbridled enjoyment of infidelity.Read full story
(2005) Viagra's new marketing icon: Charles Lindbergh
New York. Madison Avenue is working overtime to counter the negative press recently associated with the use of Viagra, the darling drug of Pfizer. Although it is considered to be risky, Pfizer's advertising firm, Scaley LLC, has chosen a dea...Read full story
(2012) Pattinson cousin is only man in America who has never seen the Twilight Saga
LANCASTER COUNTY, Pennsylvania (ABSNN) - A vast number of the farms in this Pennsylvania county have no electricity, no televisions, no telephones, no motor vehicles, no Honey Boo Boo. They are Amish folk, and yet, even the Amish know of the Twiligh...Read full story
(2009) Kristen Stewart's Bad Sex Memory At Thanksgiving
While several of us were allowed recently to talk with some of the cast of Twilight: New Moon, the group somehow got onto Thanksgiving, being this time of year, and some great memories they had. Probably, the other reason was because everyone was...Read full story
(2007) Born-again, Torn-again 'virgins' - spark new Islamic cult!!
[Dateline Londonistan]: Just when it seemed that Islamic fundamentalism couldn't get any more extreme, a new study has revealed that social regressionRead full story
(2009) Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders Moon Romo After HE Shows HIS Ass in Loss to Packers!
In an ultimate showing of disrespect, the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders mooned star crossed Quarterback Tony Romo after yet another dismal showing. Unable to get untracked from the highly publicized break up with Texas Free Ranging Cow, Jessica Simps...Read full story
(2007) JK Rowling "Outs" Hagrid as Bestiality Practitioner
(Manchester, UK, Nov 16) In a further surprise announcement about the sexual proclivities of one of the characters of the popular children's Harry Potter series, author JK Rowling has announced that "in my mind, Rubeus Hagrid was always in...Read full story
(2006) Britney Spears: No Longer Dr. Jekyll or Mrs. Hyde Because of Fed-Ex Sex Tape
LONDON - Britney Spears, is she the pristine clean little pop cutie, just one step removed from the Mickey Mouse Club? Or is she the very partially clad seductress displayed on magazine covers everywhere, and soon appearing in an X-rated romp near y...Read full story